2010 recap.

When I think about it, 2010 absolutely FLEW by. So much happened, it feels like, and over just twelve months, my life has changed sooo much. It's been one of the busiest years of my life, if not the most. But it's also introduced so many new aspects and dynamics to my life, and I'm only just beginning to get used to it. I feel life right now my life is a pop-up book. I just keep turning pages and opening new flaps and being surprised by each one. 2010 was a transition year, a year of so much learning and self-discovery. A battle of self-acceptance, an adventure to learn how to love others and myself even when it feels unnatural and difficult, and an overall blessing, a rewarding, blissful year of craziness. I feel like I can probably apply that statement to every single year I've lived, but this past year it was especially true.

I applied for ten schools. TEN. I don't recommend that.
I got accepted to nine of the ten, and so the elimination process began and it wasn't easy. If anyone reading this is just starting to apply to schools, make it easy on yourself and keep the limit to like five, haha.
Marymount was the very last school I applied to, and frankly it was my last choice. I didn't think much about it after I had applied, and I was set on going to Bellarmine University in Louisville, KY. But when Marymount gave me the presidential scholarship, a couple grants, and accepted me into their honors program, I figured that if I can get in and out of college in 4 years with a Nursing degree from a private University in Washington DC and be in less than $20,000 in debt when all is said and done, why not go for it?
I remember the night I decided on Marymount. I sat on my sofa and cried. I don't know if i was terrified, relieved or really happy. It was probably a chaoscombination of all three.

Aside from college decisions, I had a crazy last semester of high school. My life perspective was slapped into shape by reading the Brothers Karamazov. For real, it changed my life, go read it.
I realized I actually LIKE math, and I'm good at it. Too bad all the ridiculous math courses we took like calc 1&2, multivariable calculus, linear algebra, and theoretical mathmatics will serve absolutely no purpose for me in my chosen field of study. BIG FAT BUMMER. I feel like all that hard work suddenly took the form of a dead goldfish and got flushed down the potty.

The last day of school, me and all the seniors got in our cars [the majority of which were our families' 15 passenger vans. because that's how we rolled] and did "laps" around the school, driving around the block, honking our horns and waving our uniform kilts out the windows. It was a thing of true, irrefutable beauty. We proceeded to go back to Katie's house and jump in her pool with our uniforms on. Then I went back to my house and burned my 3-sizes-too-big uniform pants in the fire pit in my backyard. It needed to happen. And I liked it.

Summertime was a whirlwind. Starting with Allesha and Ricky's wedding which included fantastic adventures with Valpal involving making a "house" out of kiddie soccer goals in a public park at night, swinging, getting stuck in kiddie swings, sliding down slides that actually weren't so slidey, climbing fences, party pops, pb&js, american spirits and ripsticks. How much do I love my life? A lot.
I went to Val's for the 4th of july, one of the best weekends of my life. I went to Pensacola and conquered the oil spill, I went for runs on the beach and watched a sunrise. I went to my first concert [and a whole lot more] at Lollapalooza. I conquered in a battle of speed-wobbles on a longboard down a ferocious hill. I spent a week at Val's with the best girls on earth. I cornfield stargazed with my mom on the side of a country road in the middle of nowhere. That's got to be a LIFE highlight.

Summer ended with a lot of choked up goodbyes to friends going to different schools. I knew it was going to be tough to say goodbye. I had been at school with the same 26 people for 6 years, and now I was expected to suddenly go across the country alone, without anyone who has helped me become the person I am. I was sad and terrified and excited all at once. Saying goodbye to my parents was really hard. I didn't wanna cry in front of them and I think I succeeded in holding back the tears until they were halfway out the door.

College was like a dumptruck. All at once, new aspects of life just piled on top of me. It's taken a while to get a little bit un-buried by it all, but it's been an important and good process. I have discovered unforgettable friends, learned from mistakes, experienced life in a big city by myself, bonded with my sister Rebecca, gotten a job, conquered finals, got good grades, and run. a lot. I love my life.

2010, thank you for the dumb stuff, the good stuff, and everything in-between.
I have become a better me, I think. I'm glad for the challenges, ecstatic about the new people who have come into my life, and I cannot wait for 2011 to blow my mind. I want to be challenged even more, dared to be who I am in ways I never have been. I want to pray more and worry less. I want to run more and fret less. I want to say less and do more. I want to stop wanting and start BEING. I want to be who I need to be and want to be and who I'm supposed to be. I have a lot of resolutions, and I'm only going to accomplish them if I make my aspirations a part of me. 2011, bring it on. I want to be dumptrucked by life! I'm ready this time, so hit me with your best shot.
Happy New Year.