Procrastination at its strangest.

Wednesday day: full of chaosminded tom foolery. I feel like I'm drifting through life, like my feet aren't really on the ground. I can't decide if it bothers me or if it's a sign that I'm doing something right. Lately Ive been restless, as I've let on, but I think I'm steadily attacking the restless monster. Maybe this is what it feels like to get a new start. Because I haven't quite invented a new foundation yet. Doesn't mean I'm not on the right track :)

I'm in the library now-- looking like an absolute mess. I haven't worn anything outside of the "sweats" category all week long. Unless you count for work yesterday when I wore a skirt and boots, for no other reason other than that all my jeans and sweats were dirty. You know it's bad when dressing up is a last resort. My body feels like it's telling me that I haven't slept in weeks, but I have so I don't know what's going on. Every time I sleep, it seems impossible to wake up. Hahaha, i turn off my alarms without realizing it and NOTHING motivates me to get up. I need to fix this...
I've been meaning to edit this paper for a week... it's my american literature paper and it's on a short story, You think the professor would tolerate some original thought on the story and the paper topic but apparently not... This is the most frustrating revision EVER. He's insanely picky. mrehhh.

I haven't been to the gym in a frustratingly long time. I can't stannnnnnd it.

We have two weeks of school left. That freaks me OUT.

I'm going to miss so many poeple this summer... I almost don't want to leave even though I'm freaking ready to get out of school. I'm gonna miss jaime and chelsea and emily and the other emily and becca and everyone else. This summer will be so fun but I'm gonna be so lonely without my gang.

Any bets on how much longer I'll procrastinate writing this thing?

I like the word "absurd."

I found an online scrabble website. Wohholy cows.

I found out today that I have $12.35 in my bank account. That's just a little bit frightening... No gum or energy drinks for Mary for the next few weeks...

I miss Val. So much.

I can't wait for it to be summertime. You know when the sun is setting but it's like the world isn't quite ready because everything outside is still humming a pulsing, sunsoaked sound? I can't wait for mosquito-swatting front porch heart to hearts with mom and a glass of wine. I can't wait for swingset bonding with my big little brother. I can't wait for adventures with Valerie and heart to hearts and forever memories. I can't wait to hear renee and katie anne again and I can't wait to see roger's car in my driveway. I can't wait for morning runs when the sun is already hot and the neighbor's sprinklers are already clicking. I can't wait for pensacola beach-- the thick, smooth, salty air, the constant lullaby tide, and the sugar white sane that stays everywhere. At the beach, cocktails are at five, dinner is anytime after we feel like cocktails are done. Usually around 8 :] Becca is bringing her man to pensacola this summer-- i can;t wait for him to meet the family! what a keeper, that billybear.

I really need to start this paper, I'm going to be in here all night.

I am tired, but trying. Kinda lonely, but hopeful and happy that tomorrow's sunshine will brighten my soul a little. CRAP I HAVE CHOIR IN 30 MINUTES.