i won't sell myself short.

I am starting out by saying that I have so much to be grateful for-- steadfast, amazing parents who amidst their own daily struggles would bend over backward and lasso the moon for me if I needed it, the best, most steadfast loving man I could ever hope to have is mine and he is the sweetest friend I've ever had, I am living independently, there is a little bit of food in my fridge/cabinets that will get me through the week (even though for the past few days, my diet has consisted of a bagel, leftover pizza, smoothie juice and lots of h2O), uber exists, I am aliiiive.

I had about a 5 minute conversation with my boss, and I mean the boss of my boss's boss today. When he took me aside, I at first thought that I was in trouble haha, because in the full year I've worked at this place, he and I haven't exchanged much more than hellos. To my surprise, however, he wanted my opinions on how things were going at work, wanting my insight as to how things could look better, emphasizing that he wants me to further my goals and recognizing that they certainly don't stop here. I was so encouraged. He gave me some very high compliments on how I do my job and made it clear that I was crucial to how the place is supposed to run. I felt free to express myself to him in that moment, both technical details on how a shit should operate, but also my personal expectations, goals and hopes. It all made me start to wonder "am I selling myself short?" I found something my heart is 100% in and that I'm incredibly good at, but the professional tier level I'm at is basic. It's a stupi thing that I've gotten the education I have this far and have learned so much and gotten so good at a concentration that I can't get credentials for. I'm wrestling with a stalemate. I LOVE my job. But I can't teach other people to have a passion, that's what this job needs is a heart that is willing and open and desirous to serve. It's a disposition, and to be good at the job, you have to go beyond the job description on paper. Memory care is so different than typical CNA work. So, so different. I chalk it up to parenting practice, because I have learned how to be patient in the weirdest, most stressful of times, I've gotten pushed to my absolute limit. Yet, I've managed to keep my cool and be graceful. It's a GIFT. I don't want to waste it or sell myself short. I have so many desires to further my education, keep myself in this field, do so many things... And no money or open avenues to do tht yet. So for now, I'll keep excelling at what I'm good at, keep an eagle eye open, and keep being prayerful. I refuse to sell myself short.